Saturday, August 8, 2015

And Then Life Happened

You know how sometimes you have the greatest of intentions in starting up a brand new project - say for example, starting a blog - then life has to go and change course on you? That's what has happened to me. The last time I posted (which was also the first time, but hey, don't judge) I had actually been sitting at work and things in life were still relatively code 5. Deputy Dad and I had found out about a week earlier that we were going to move out of my beloved little apartment to a place about 35 miles south. We would be moving from a 1 bed, 1 bath, 750 square foot apartment to a 3 bed, 2 bath, 1200 square foot home situated on almost a full acre lot. Sounds amazing, right?? Who wouldn't love an upgrade like that, especially when it came with a $400/month reduction in our housing cost?

But that which seems to be too good to be true generally is.

You see, the previous tenant of the home was none other than Deputy Dad's ex-wife. And I was slightly apprehensive of moving into the home they had shared as a married couple. We found out around 6/23 that we would need to move, and it made the most sense for us to find someone to sublet our apartment and move to the bigger and cheaper home. We posted the apartment on Craigslist and considered ourselves the luckiest people in the world when less than 24 hours later we had someone who wanted to take over the apartment and move in on July 6. We scrambled to make things work and managed to pull it off where we would be able to move on July 3rd, which was a Friday and also the weekend we were to have the kiddos. No biggie, I thought. I just pulled off a cross-country move. I am an organizing champion! I can do anything!!

Oh boy. Was I so, so, so wrong.

You see, the entire time we were planning this move people were trying to warn me about what I would find inside of that house. They tried and tried and tried. Deputy Dad tried to warn me, repeatedly. Many of his friends tried to warn me, repeatedly. But I figured, clearly a mother with three kids at least keeps a clean house, if not a tidy one.

Oh boy. Was I so, so wrong.

We got in to the new to me house on July 1. I walked in the door and almost had tears come to my eyes by the sight that greeted me. The sheer amount of filth that stared back at me made me want to light a match and run for the hills.  Lest you think I'm joking, please let me submit photographic evidence:

This is under the vent hood...not somewhere people always remember to clean, but I promise I'll never forget to again!
We pulled the oven drawer out, and found all of this under the oven

And then there was the saga of the fridge... (no judgement on my awesome shoe & sock combo here, please)

The terrible horrible fridge


That fridge was the bane of my existence, y'all.  I opened it up and started retching.  Then I put on my big girl panties, grabbed my bleach spray and my Mr. Clean Magic Erasers, snapped on my rubber gloves, and went to town.  I scrubbed that bad boy down for three hours and I got it to sparkling, but this odd odor still wafted out every time you opened the door.  I had unplugged the fridge to clean it, so Deputy Dad and I made the decision to leave the doors open for 24 hours (I found the fridge on 7/1 when we got the keys) to see if that helped the smell.  When we got back to the fridge on 7/2, Deputy Dad pulled it out so we could clean behind it.  And we saw things moving.  So Deputy Dad pulled off the back of the fridge to expose the fridge, and exposed every Southerner's worst nightmare.  There was a colony of cockroaches living in our fridge.  Deputy Dad immediately dragged the thing outside, where it sat for a week until we hauled it off to the dump.  Neither he nor I could deal with the worry that, even if we fogged the fridge, there would be a chance that we missed something and the creepy-crawly problem would never go away.

So, now you know why I started a blog and then disappeared on the same day that I started it!  On the bright side, this new adventure means that I have plenty of new projects and stories to share to keep you entertained.  Be warned...some stories may require a cast iron stomach.

PS >> In the middle of all of this, the Little turned 2 on 7/4.  Deputy Dad and I managed to pull off a pretty great cookout, a delicious cake, and some Frozen dolls for the Frozen-obsessed Little.  We had a great 4th of July Birthday!!!  The kiddos even had patriotic outfits and spent some time hanging out on the tailgate of a pickup truck, to ensure full #AmericanChild staus was achieved.

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